Wednesday, January 25, 2012

After 2012

I found out about a fun little hop is being put together by some of my favorite people -- Lillie McFerrin, Angela Goff, Angie Richmond, and Daniel Swensen. I like these guys and their prompt enough that I probably would have entered anyway. But when I found out the grand prize was a 50 page critique from Lillie, I had to enter. Lillie has helped me before and she is wonderful person to have critiquing your work.

Now what would a hop be without rules? They are as follows:

Write a piece of flash fiction, poem, or song (300 words or less) using the photo as your inspiration. Post it on your blog any time between now and when the linky closes. Every eligible entry will qualify for a chance to win one of the prizes listed below. The linky will be open from January 23 through January 30.
Angie, Angela, Daniel and I will read, debate, and decide on five winners for the following:

1st: Fifty page critique by Lillie McFerrin

2nd: Twenty-Five page critique by Angie Richmond

3rd: Fifteen page critique by Angela Goff

4th: Ten page critique by Daniel Swensen

5th: A copy of Steven King’s On Writing

Aren't those prizes awesome? And the photo prompt is equally as cool. Here it is, along with my entry.







Saraiah stuck her hands into her pockets in an attempt to still the shaking. The council had gathered all together after she related to them events that took place in the clearing.

"Please, tell us what you saw."

It was the council spokeswoman, Regina. She had been addressing the one-hundred or so who gathered on the wooden benches around an outdoor stadium, but at this moment she was staring at Saraiah. The girl stood, her legs wobbling as she crossed to the stage.

With an encouraging nod from Regina Saraiah addressed the group,"I--- I saw --- it was a bot."

It started as a few whispers but soon the crowd was murmuring their panicked cries.

"Everyone please calm down," Regina said in her best we can work this out voice.

"We need to take action!" an older gentleman yelled out, "I won't see those bots taking over our lands again. There is no place left to run!"

Regina spread her hands wide and kept her face smooth,"Everyone just take your seats and let Saraiah
explain. There is still hope yet."

The spokeswoman looked at Saraiah and smiled, but that did nothing to ease the mood.

"It was a glowing light hanging from the sky. Just one.It might be easily severed."

Even though Saraiah had said the words she had no confidence in them. It had started out this way in other lands. A single piece of bot popping up in the middle of a wilderness. The world had been overtaken now. This was the last place that hadn't been touched. The last colony of humans trying to survive.

The words were as hollow as Saraiah felt. There would be no more surviving, no more hiding. It was time for the final battle, and already the bots had won.

30 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nice! Not where my mind went when I first saw that picture. But no less effective because damn that's a great ending.

Joanne said...

I always enjoy flash fiction, little stories that pack a lot of punch. Great job, and good luck!

Sarah Pearson said...

I liked where that went. I'm with Joshua, I love the unexpected :-)

Patricia T. said...

Very creative entry!. I enjoyed the twist -- was surprised by the ending.

Leigh Covington said...

Oh man! Great job Jennie! I love it! I want more, I want more!!!! This is such a fun blog hop. I wish I had more time to participate. This week has me running ragged. *sigh*

ruanna3 said...

So excited you entered the Hop. Nice work! :)

David P. King said...

You make me want to drop everything and participate. Fine. You win. Time to get my flash fiction gloves on.

Excellent tension and imagery, J! :)

Emily R. King said...

Great job! I hope you win one of the prizes.

J. A. Bennett said...

yes! Wahoo!

J. A. Bennett said...

Thank you dearie :)

J. A. Bennett said...

Thanks hon! I like your entry too ^_^

Donna K. Weaver said...

Oooo ... nice. I wanted more! Good luck.

J. A. Bennett said...

hehe, I actually thought of an outline for a book in head when I wrote this. Maybe someday...

J. A. Bennett said...

I'm so glad, I sometime think my endings are boring, and I'm never quite sure. Thanks for stopping by!

J. A. Bennett said...

tee-hee ^__^

J. A. Bennett said...

Thank you Joanne!

J. A. Bennett said...

I was trying to think outside the box, so I'm glad to hear that you thought it was different :)

Lillie McFerrin said...

OH so good :) Thanks for the kind words, too!!

Lillie McFerrin said...

Don't you love when that happens?? I want to read that book someday :)

Tara Tyler said...

eerie! well done. that is a strange picture, thrown off by the light bulb (said like Gru from Despicable Me)

cherie said...

Ooh, dystopian sci-fi! Nice one! Goodluck ;)

Gwen said...

SF! I love genre fiction. And that picture is so fabulous I have to write something about it now.

Kristin Baker Przybyla said...

How fun! I love post-apocalyptic fiction (should I maybe say dystopian from now on, because my fingers always trip over p.a. several times before I can type it right, hehe), and also love that picture. Those are some super cool prizes! Even 5th place is awesome. I have On Writing, and it's a great book.

Angela Brown said...

Good luck with the contest. I really enjoyed your entry. I've just been on a dystopian roll lately so this was right up my alley.

Donna B. McNicol said...

Nice twist...really enjoyed it. Definitely a good book idea!

Catherine Noble said...

What a creepy twist! You've managed to make the lightbulb seem so sinister and imposing. I love it! :)

Huntress said...

Whoa! Good storyline to go with the picture. New follower here.

Bullish said...

I love it!! I'm gonna be terrified to turn out the light tonight - actually, I'm gonna be afraid to turn the light ON, what with that creepy bod lightbulb staring at me! Eeeeek! ;)

Kevin Hiatt said...

JA, really liked the sense of foreboding in your story. I'm always jealous of writers who so easily elicit an emotional response, and yours definitely delivers that. I was afraid that 300 words wouldn't give me enough wiggle room to generate that, but you did it wonderfully. Well done! +1 follower.

Erin Ashby said...

I just posted mine, now I'm reading everyone else's. I'm so glad someone else did sci-fi too! I liked it. I really like the idea of sci-fi flash fiction.