Here's the thing. I love my book. Both times that I read and edited, I did it within three days. It's easy for me to get lost in the characters and the story and fall in love each time I read it again. But not everyone is going to love my book.
It's a good thing to have people read your book who don't like it. You can get insights into things you might have otherwise missed. At the same time, it's really hard.
I handed my book over to a complete stranger that I met on Ladies Who Critique. It takes a big leap of faith to trust your baby with someone you don't know, but someone who you trust will give you honest feedback.
The only problem is that sometimes honesty is translated as, here's everything I hate. Which, for me, is sometimes a lot to swallow. I want to know that they at least laughed at my jokes or considered something thoughtful about my characters. But to deal with a rampage, it can take a lot out of person.
Critiques are important. They help you grow. This person had a lot of good points about my book that I would not have picked up on. But one comment has stuck in my head and refused to let go.
She told me she hated my main character. HATED! Why? She thought my MC was too confident in herself, and cocky to boot. Personally, I don't have problem with confidence. In fact, I love a character who can take the story by being a strong leader. That's how I wrote my character. When it comes to time travel, she knows how to handle herself.
Not everyone is going to agree. It's hard when you love someone so much, and they feel so real to you and you're told that they are awful people. It's like a stranger coming up and telling you your friends and family are worthless.
My head is in a bad place right now becasue of it. I can't change who my character is. She's confident becasue she knows how to handle the situation. It doesn't mean she's not flawed. She makes mistakes. Sometimes she's rude without meaning to be that way. Sometimes she doesn't see people for who they really are.
Even with all that being said, I still love my book. I've just lost confidence in if it's right to share with the world.
Yet, I'm still going to try. I can't quit just becasue one person didn't like my MC. I may be the only person in the world who does. And that's okay, becasue at least I didn't give up on myself.