Thursday, July 12, 2012

Working Through the Hard Stuff

If you saw my post last week for the Insecure Writers Support Group, you already know I haven't had much of an opportunity to write. Everything has been fine for me health wise. I (thankfully) haven't gone into labor again, but I've also been very cautious in making sure I'm resting enough and doing everything I can to keep this baby inside me for a few more weeks.

Because of that, my writing time has been severally cut and I haven't had the chance to write everyday. In the past week, I think I've read ten posts about writing everyday to become a better writer. I have a little guilty squirm in my stomach every time I read one.

I want to write everyday. I want to improve and become a better, stronger, writer. But I can't. And I feel like it's pushing my writing backwards.





I know. You really don't have to tell me that this too shall pass and that I'll get the chance to write everyday when things settle down. I know this. I tell myself this daily. It doesn't make it any easier.

I hate to be a downer. I guess I'm here to put all my feelings out there so that I can move forward and be stronger. That's the power of writing. It's the chance to improve yourself by putting your thoughts on paper.

This is me coming out and saying, "I'm weak right now, and I just need to share it with the world in order to move on."

So tell me, have you ever been in a position where you want to, but you can't?  What did you do to be strong?

27 comments:

Kyra Lennon said...

*hugs*

Yes, I feel that way every so often, and the only way for me to get over it is to take off the pressure and allow the feelings to pass without forcing them. That does mean it takes me longer to finish a project but I'd rather that than be stressed all the time. :)

Anonymous said...

I am actually NOT a fan of that "write everyday" advice. I read a quote once - from a published author, no less - that said that is actually bad advice, that you have to put your relationships with people (especially your family) first, and your writing second, or else your life (and by extension, your writing) will suffer. I cling to that during this time when my kids are small and so dependent on me for everything and some days it's all I can do to put meals on the table and take care of the kids, and writing is a faint, fond dream. It's okay. This is life happening right here, and in the end, my writing WILL be stronger just for how I've lived.

Kelley Lynn said...

I find that thinking about writing, ideas, scenes, characters, is just as important as actually physically writing it down. Perhaps now isn't 'writing time', but that doesn't mean your any less of a writer. Just think about it, mull it over. When the time comes when you have time, you'll be ready :)

Cassie Mae said...

Oh girl, hugs!!! The last bit of the pregnancy is so hard, and hearing... "Don't worry, you don't have too much longer." Or, "Just imagine in so and so months/weeks, you'll have your little baby." doesn't help. You kinda want to pummel people's face in and tell them to fetch you whatever you're craving for the day. Then you feel guilty about that, but you don't feel like apologizing because you're too pissy or too miserable to care that much, and you just don't want to deal with it.

Or maybe that's just me when I'm pregnant, but I'd like to think it's everyone.

I act out scenes when I'm not near the computer or when I can't write right then. You may look like a fool, but who cares, right? Maybe people will leave you alone if they think you're crazy! Lol.

Cassie Mae said...

Look at that. I went to correct "write/right" and ended up using both anyway, then misspelled *them. Can you tell I'm having a morning? ;)

Stephanie McGee said...

REally, writing every day is something that works for some writers. Maybe even most writers. It can be important for writers who are on deadline. But honestly, you're not going to be able to write every day if you don't take care of yourself first and foremost. It's just a fact of life. The body can only be pushed so hard for so long before it rebels.

Don't worry about the rules and regulations other people put out there. They might not work for you and the situation you're in currently (at whatever time currently is when you're reading those rules and regulations).

Anonymous said...

I think this post is a great indication of how 'strong' you really are. Do what's best for you - It has been my experience that the words are very patient and they will still be there when we're ready and able to play with them again.

Suzanne Furness said...

I think most of us have this feeling at some point so don't feel bad. Just tell yourself it will change. I usually only get to do 'serious' writing/editing at the weekend because of work and family commitments and it drives me nuts sometimes but all these things are important too. I don't seem to be able to put my mind to plotting and writing late at night when I'm too tired so weekdays it tends to be blogging or a bit of reasearch and I often feel bad about this, as if I've failed somehow. Oh this writing rollercoaster. *HUGS*

Ruth Josse said...

I know exactly how you feel. (minus the preggo part) And you're right. It's tough. But I also know that it will pass! Hugs your way, it will get better. Take care of yourself. :)

Anonymous said...

Lady, I am in the same place except I have no good excuse and I'm not even bothering to read about how to get out of it. I go through these phases, for a few months I'm really into writing and platform building and then some other life event comes up (currently it's house hunting) and I lose all motivation to focus on it. And then I feel guilty every single day that goes by, thinking I'm maybe just not a "real" writer. And then out of nowhere, something I see or hear or read gets the juices going and I'm totally inspired again. Of course if I ever had the good luck to get published that "recovery time" would need to get much shorter. I think you're making the best effort you can right now and you just need to trust the process. It's all any of us can do

Anonymous said...

Lady, I am in the same place except I have no good excuse and I'm not even bothering to read about how to get out of it. I go through these phases, for a few months I'm really into writing and platform building and then some other life event comes up (currently it's house hunting) and I lose all motivation to focus on it. And then I feel guilty every single day that goes by, thinking I'm maybe just not a "real" writer. And then out of nowhere, something I see or hear or read gets the juices going and I'm totally inspired again. Of course if I ever had the good luck to get published that "recovery time" would need to get much shorter. I think you're making the best effort you can right now and you just need to trust the process. It's all any of us can do

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I'm sorry! Can your husband take dictation?

T. Z. Wallace said...

Take care of yourself first and foremost: mentally, physically, emotionally.

Annalisa Crawford said...

I never write everyday, and I actually don't feel the need to - so please don't think every writer is doing something you can't do, just think about me not writing.

Take care of yourself!

Susan Roebuck said...

I don't write every day! It seems that if I force myself to, I only come up with rubbish, so I wait until the urge hits - and that can take a while. If we all wrote every day, think of all the books we'd have finished! Phew! Cut yourself some slack, you're doing very well as you are :-)

Mark Noce said...

I feel ya! Getting time to write requires some crazy creativity. I hate to say it, but I've actually cut time back from blogging to make more room for writing in my schedule. I hope to eventually rectify this though:)

JEFritz said...

I hate when those "can't" times come up. I try a million different things to inspire myself (occasionally they work). How was I strong? I picked a date and said "Fine, I won't sit down and write until then." It was still hard when I did it, but once I pushed myself through, it got easier.

Good luck with the baby. I hope the next few weeks go well for both of you.

Nick Wilford said...

I agree with the others. You're not any less of a writer if you're unable to write at times for any reason. I do think it can work in our favour as you will eventually come back to it refreshed and have so many ideas to get down. We need thinking time, and living time, too.

Tara Tyler said...

feelin for you. i'm there all the time! must get this and such done before i can write...ugh!

ps, have something for you tomorrow =)

Leigh Covington said...

I have that happen often, although not quite as serious as your situation. What I try to remember is that my writing is waiting for me and it'll be there when you're ready. You're not going backwards, you're just at a bit of a stand still. :) Keep smiling! You'll be writing every day again soon!

Jay Noel said...

I went through something similar, but for a different reason (obviously). With a new job that requires travel, I was just too wiped out when I was home to write.

My drought lasted from May all the way through just last week.

I got involved with a collaboration project, and that got my creative energy back up. It helped me get back to working on my own project and churned out about 4000 words just last week.

So maybe take on something new and easy, just to be creative.

Goku shrestha said...

yea , i wanted to pursue something about different career but i had to take accountancy since i was good with studies , thats all. but i think its okay and things will definitely get better :)

Donna K. Weaver said...

But you also have to be realistic. And with a baby's life on the line, nothing gets more realistic than that.

Yay for no more preterm labor! Keep it up! ;)

Morgan said...

You're in SUCH a hard place right now... like, so, so, SO tough. My heart is with you! I can't wait until everything can settle down and you can be back to "normal" ... if there is a normal anymore!!!!! <3

Lauren said...

You don't have to write deathless prose, or a certain word count. Just write.

A journal entry, a blog post, a nastygram on the wall of the bathroom--it's all writing. If you write for you, how much you write doesn't matter.

I tried to stop writing once (on a dare) and by the end of the month I was acting like an addict going through withdrawal. All the time. I think he regretted the dare...

Anonymous said...

Writing does not always have to mean sitting in front of the computer. We can jot down new ideas, read a book on craft, or let a current idea simmer.

Best wishes on the upcoming arrival of your little one!

Christa Desir said...

Oh sweetie, this happens to all of us at one point or another. You have to give yourself time and space. Sometimes you can't because you're human. And that's fine. It doesn't go away. I promise. It's still waiting for you.